How to Disciple a New Believer

Written By Alex Rossie

By The OM Team. Last reviewed September 2026.

Someone you know has started following Jesus. Maybe you led them to faith. Maybe your pastor asked you to "take them under your wing." Either way, you're wondering what to actually do next.

You don't need a program, a seminary degree or a perfect plan. Show up consistently, usually once a week. Open the Bible together. Be willing to go first. The goal is simple to say and hard to do: walk with them until they can follow Jesus without depending on you, and help someone else do the same.

This guide shows how to disciple a new believer week to week. It starts with a meeting you can repeat and the pattern we use to hand each practice over. If you're looking for a structured process to use, see our guide to discipleship curriculum for new believers. This page is about the relationship that makes any process work.

What It Means to Disciple a New Believer

We define a disciple as "someone who follows Jesus by obeying His teachings and lifestyle." Discipleship is the intentional work of modeling and teaching the ways of Christ, so the people you disciple take ownership of their own faith and go on to disciple others.

That last part changes how you approach the person in front of you. You're not trying to become their permanent spiritual advisor. You're trying to work yourself out of a job.

Paul gave Timothy the pattern: "the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others" (2 Timothy 2:2). What Timothy received was meant to be passed to people who could eventually teach others. That's the direction of discipleship from the first meeting, even though maturity and readiness still matter along the way.

We use a simple test. If you disappeared tomorrow, could the person you've been discipling keep following Jesus and help someone else do the same? If not, the work isn't finished yet.

Church leaders know this is hard to do well. In a 2020 phone survey of 1,000 Protestant senior pastors, conducted by Grey Matter Research for Discipleship.org and Exponential, fewer than 5% of churches had a reproducing disciple-making culture by the study's measures. In Barna's 2015 State of Discipleship study, only 1% of church leaders said today's churches are doing very well at discipling new and young believers.

The Three Values Behind It

Everything on this page comes from three core values, and the order matters.

Intimacy with Jesus comes first. The Christian life grows out of time spent with Him, so the most important habits you model are reading His Word and talking with Him.

Intentional Relationships means you make time for the person, do what you say and stay honest. That's why this runs on a weekly meeting and a shared life, not a class.

Multiplication is the fruit, not the formula. From the start, you're helping them become someone who can help another person follow Jesus.

A Simple Weekly Meeting You Can Repeat

If you're meeting with someone this week, keep it simple enough to repeat. Meet somewhere comfortable, like your kitchen table, a coffee shop or somewhere quiet over lunch. Plan on about an hour, and follow the same rhythm each time:

  1. Start with the heart. Ask, "How is your heart?" Then listen. What's going on in their life usually shapes what they need that week.

  2. Follow up on last week. Ask about the step they said they'd take: "How did you walk that out?" This is where growth gets real. It's also where grace matters most, because some weeks the answer will be "I didn't."

  3. Read a short passage together. A paragraph is enough. Read it out loud, maybe twice.

  4. Ask questions and let them discover. What does this say about God? What does it say about people? What stands out to you?

  5. Land on one question. "What is God saying to you, and what are you going to do about it?" Help them name one specific step for the week.

  6. Pray together. Pray for the step they named and for whatever came up at the start.

The next week, start again with the heart and the follow-up. The repetition is the point. We keep the meeting this simple because the person you're discipling should eventually be able to run it with someone else.

Hand It Over: I Do, You Watch

From the first meeting, model each practice in a way they can eventually repeat. We use a four-stage pattern to move someone from watching to leading:

  • I do, you watch. You model it.

  • I do, you help. They take part.

  • You do, I watch. They lead, and you're there.

  • You do, I celebrate. They do it on their own, and you cheer them on.

Take prayer as an example. In the first weeks, you pray and they listen. Later, you pray and ask them to add a sentence. After a while, they pray for the two of you while you listen. Eventually they're praying with a friend of their own, and you hear about it afterward.

Use the same pattern for reading a passage, asking the weekly question, sharing their story and inviting someone else into a next step. The goal isn't only that they learn what to do. It's that they learn how to help another person do it too.

First Steps With a New Believer

Your role in the first few weeks isn't to explain everything. It's to help them start practicing the basics with you. For the new believer's own checklist of first steps, point them to our discipleship curriculum guide.

Lead with the gospel. Make sure they can say what happened in plain words. God made us to know Him. Our sin separates us from Him, and we can't fix that ourselves. Jesus Christ lived the life we couldn't, died for our sins and rose from the dead. Everyone who turns from sin and trusts in Him is forgiven and made right with God, by grace through faith and not by their own effort (Ephesians 2:8-9).

Listen for the early questions. They often sound like this: Is this real? Did it stick? What do I do now? Their standing with God rests on what Jesus did, not on how they feel on a hard day. When they stumble, and they will, help them bring it to God instead of hiding it. Treat doubts as normal, and work through them together.

Go first, then hear their story. Share how you came to faith, what you struggled with early on and what you still struggle with. Then ask for their story, and listen well. You don't need to know everything. You need to be grounded enough to open Scripture with them, model obedience and admit what you don't know.

Start where they are. Someone who grew up in church and drifted away needs something different from someone who has never opened a Bible. Some need the big picture of the Bible's story first. Others need help with one urgent question. Adjust the pace so they aren't overwhelmed.

Read the Bible with them before you ask them to read it alone. Make sure they have a Bible they can read and understand. Peter uses the picture of a newborn to describe a believer's hunger for growth: "crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation" (1 Peter 2:2). Read the first few chapters of the Gospel of John together, then help them settle into one chapter a day, using the weekly question as their method.

Pray out loud together every time you meet. Keep it plain, so they hear that prayer is a conversation, not a performance. Model short prayers of thanks, confession and asking for other people. Some won't pray out loud for weeks, and that's fine. Invite them, and don't pressure them.

Point them toward baptism and a local church. Jesus made baptism part of making disciples (Matthew 28:19). Start that conversation early, and encourage them to talk with their local church about taking the step. Help them get connected there too. You're not a replacement for the church. You're one person inside it.

Remember who does the growing. You aren't the one who grows them. The Holy Spirit does that work. Paul puts it simply: "Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit" (Galatians 5:25). Your part is to show up, stay honest and point them to Jesus.

Worship, Service and Sharing Their Faith

Worship. Go to your church's gathering together when you can. Afterward, ask what stood out to them about God. Gathering with God's people is part of the Christian life, not an extra.

Service and giving. Help them try one way to serve at their church, and notice what fits them. Talk about giving as a way of trusting God with what He's given them.

Sharing their faith. Their story is fresh right now. Help them practice telling it in a few minutes: what life was like before, how they met Jesus and what's different now. Then encourage them to tell one person.

Ask Questions Instead of Giving Answers

When someone asks a question, the natural move is to answer it. Sometimes that's right. More often, it's better to help them find the answer in Scripture. If you answer every question, they learn to depend on you instead of learning to read the Bible for themselves.

Jesus often asked questions that required people to answer for themselves. In Matthew 16:15, He asked His disciples, "Who do you say I am?"

  • Instead of explaining a passage, ask, "What do you think this means?"

  • Instead of fixing their problem, ask, "What does this passage say to that?"

  • Instead of guessing when you don't know, say, "I don't know. Let's find out together."

Discovery takes longer than giving an answer. It also teaches them where to look when you're not there.

Share Your Life, Not Only Your Notes

When Jesus chose the twelve, Mark holds two purposes together: "He appointed twelve that they might be with him and that he might send them out to preach" (Mark 3:14). Paul described his time with the believers in Thessalonica the same way: "Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well" (1 Thessalonians 2:8).

Some of the most important discipleship happens around the weekly meeting. Invite them to dinner with your family. Let them see how you handle a stressful day or a hard phone call. Bring them along when you serve. A book can't ask how their week went, so don't hand them one and disappear.

One on One and a Group

Think of the group as something you add, not a replacement for the one-on-one time.

One-on-one time is especially useful early. New Christians often have questions they won't ask in front of others. Some personal time gives them room to ask basic questions without feeling behind.

A group adds more relationships. It brings more voices, more examples of faith and more people who notice growth. In our experience, someone new to faith does well in a discipleship group when the leader invited them personally and is ready to slow down and explain things. Joining a group doesn't have to end your time together. Keep giving them space for questions, prayer and follow-up.

A few guidelines we follow:

  • One or two new believers in a group is great. A group made mostly of new believers is harder, because there are fewer mature examples in the room to model what the group is trying to build.

  • New believers shouldn't lead a group in their first year or so. Helping a friend take a next step with Jesus is not the same as carrying responsibility for a whole group. They can start sharing, praying and walking with someone else long before they're ready to lead a group. They can lead parts of a meeting, and they should.

  • Everyone should know what they're saying yes to. Explain the commitment before they join.

See how our men's discipleship groups and women's discipleship groups work.

When Should Your Role Change?

Discipleship never ends, but this season of it does. There's no fixed schedule, and faithfulness matters more than speed. You'll know your role is starting to change when a few things are true:

  • They read Scripture and pray on their own, without you prompting them.

  • They can answer the weekly question for themselves.

  • They're connected to a local church and to other believers besides you.

  • They've started helping someone else take a next step with Jesus, even informally.

If every spiritual decision still runs through you, something is off. Keep pointing them to Jesus, to the Bible and to their church.

Multiplication is one of the clearest signs the relationship is changing, alongside those other signs of growth. The goal isn't simply that they find someone to teach. It's that they're becoming the kind of disciple who can faithfully help someone else follow Jesus. When that happens, your role shifts from guide to friend and encourager.

Common Questions

What is the first step to discipleship? For a new believer, it's following Jesus: trusting Him and starting to obey what He says. For you, it's showing up. Ask them to meet, go first with your own story, and open the Bible together.

What are the 7 D's of discipleship? There isn't one universal list. One widely circulated version comes from Julianne Stanz of Loyola Press: Desire, Discernment, Decision-Making for Christ, Discipline, Dwelling in the Word, Dependence on the Holy Spirit and Doing. Our discipleship curriculum guide compares it with other lists.

What are the five principles of discipleship? There's no single agreed list of five. Our workbook teaches seven discipleship principles: Accept Him, Know Him, Obey Him, Make Sacrifices, Share Him, Love Others and Make Disciples.

What are the five stages of discipleship? The best-known five-stage model comes from Jim Putman's work on real-life discipleship: spiritually dead, spiritual infant, spiritual child, spiritual young adult and spiritual parent. Our four-stage pattern above describes something different: how you hand each practice over.

Where Ordinary Movement Fits

Everything above can begin with two people and an open Bible. If you want a structured process that carries the same practices into a small group, our discipleship curriculum for new believers guide explains how the Ordinary Movement process works: 27 sessions in a workbook, with groups meeting weekly for about six months or every other week for about twelve months. Our team coaches leaders through launch and beyond. When you're ready to lead, start leader training and plan your group with our launch guide.

Sources

Alex Rossie
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Discipleship Curriculum for New Believers